You know… I often compared my past to Jonah’s, but after rereading the Book of Jonah as part of our family Bible study (we’re reading through the entire Bible together), I do not think it was a proper analogy. Yes, I ran away from what God wanted me to do before repenting and completely submitting to Him, but I certainly did not do it for the reasons that Jonah did! Not that this justifies my past failings in any way.
In Jonah Chapter 1:1-3–I’m using the New Living Translation (sorry, KJV Only folks)–we read:
The Lord gave this message to Jonah son of Amittai: ‘Get up and go to the great city of Nineveh. Announce my judgment against it because I have seen how wicked its people are.’ But Jonah got up and went in the opposite direction to get away from the Lord. He went down to the port of Joppa, where he found a ship leaving for Tarshish. He bought a ticket and went on board, hoping to escape from the Lord by sailing to Tarshish.
While it is true that I ran from God’s calling to preach the Gospel, I never dared to think that I could escape my Heavenly Father. The LORD first revealed Himself to me when I was very young, and I was well aware that I could never escape His loving hand. But I was scared. Scared to stand in front of people all alone like a public spectacle. I was terrified of speaking publicly. When I stood at the podium the first day of my preaching class at Southeastern Bible College, my knees shook, I began sweating profusely, and my mouth was dry as cotton. I felt as if I were being cooked in the bright lights with my peers watching. This is quite different from Jonah’s reasons for bolting. We learn his motive at the end of Chapter 4 after Jonah has preached to the wicked city and everyone repented of their sins. Yes, everyone. Jonah preached repentance and 120,000 were saved. That’s the greatest revival ever! Jonah should have been thrilled–right?
Not so much.
Let’s look at Jonah 4:1-3:
This change of plans greatly upset Jonah, and he became very angry. So he complained to the Lord about it: ‘Didn’t I say before I left home that you would do this, Lord? That is why I ran away to Tarshish! I knew that you are a merciful and compassionate God, slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love. You are eager to turn back from destroying people. Just kill me now, Lord! I’d rather be dead than alive if what I predicted will not happen.’
What?! Jonah was angry? Yes. His true motive for running from God’s call to evangelize Nineveh was that he hated the people God was sending him to warn. In modern times, it would be like God calling an Israeli to preach to–well, to Ramallah, Tehran, or any other major Muslim city. Jonah didn’t want the city to repent. He wanted God’s judgment to fall on Nineveh and destroy the enemies of Israel.
So If Not Jonah…
After giving the matter much thought, I reluctantly came to realize that I had been more like Peter. Peter… the Apostle that denied Christ. In Mark Chapter 14, we read:
Meanwhile, Peter was in the courtyard below. One of the servant girls who worked for the high priest came by and noticed Peter warming himself at the fire. She looked at him closely and said, ‘You were one of those with Jesus of Nazareth.’ But Peter denied it. ‘I don’t know what you’re talking about,’ he said, and he went out into the entryway. Just then, a rooster crowed.When the servant girl saw him standing there, she began telling the others, ‘This man is definitely one of them!’ But Peter denied it again. A little later some of the other bystanders confronted Peter and said, ‘You must be one of them, because you are a Galilean.’ Peter swore, ‘A curse on me if I’m lying—I don’t know this man you’re talking about!’ And immediately the rooster crowed the second time. Suddenly, Jesus’ words flashed through Peter’s mind: ‘Before the rooster crows twice, you will deny three times that you even know me.’ And he broke down and wept.
Let’s be honest here… Peter’s motivation was nothing more than self-preservation: cowardice at its basest. If anyone knew who Jesus was, it was Peter. It was he who made the famous proclamation, “You are the Messiah,” in Mark 8:29. Knowing this, Peter should have stood by Jesus–regardless of the cost. He had to have known that Christ would empower him to stand. But he denied Him. And so did I. You see… I came to know Christ when I was a child. I had seen His Holy Spirit at work in my dad’s church, and in my everyday life as a preacher’s kid. I saw people healed, delivered from demonic possession and addictions, and relationships supernaturally healed. I knew Jesus was who He said He was–that He would empower me to obey His calling. But I was scared. The reality is that–like Peter–I didn’t trust Him enough to stand with Him.
When asked, I think many preachers would like to say they identify most with the Apostle Paul, King David, or Abraham. But the reality is that most of us have gone through periods of life when we were much like Peter. Peter the zealot… who often stuck his sandal in his mouth; Peter who walked on water… but ended up chugging the Sea of Galilee; Peter who proclaimed Jesus was the Messiah… but abandoned Him at the worst possible time. But isn’t this what Christ is all about? He doesn’t care about your failings in the past. What He does care about is your future. Peter may have failed Christ in the past, but he was ultimately martyred for his faith. He finished strong.
Perhaps you’ve been a Peter, a Paul… or even a Jonah. The fact that these men were greatly used of God means that we have hope. Yes, we may have sinned horribly and failed Christ in the past, but we have now. And we have as much time in the future that He chooses to give us. I love what the Apostle Paul–who murdered and imprisoned Christians in his past–said about moving forward in Philippians 3:13-14: “Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus!” Amen! We can’t change our past, but we can repent of our sins and–side-by-side with Jesus–press forward and finish strong! That’s what I’m doing–how about you?
In Christ’s perfect love,
Dwight
The Parson
